Bibliobibuli

Tests came back. Nuttin' in my noggin. Good news, but also slightly frustrating. Next up: more alternative therapies... yay?

Haven't been sleeping very well. Most days I'm up around 4. I made a New Year's Resolution: Gain 10 pounds by New Year's! My mantra: Please try and eat SOMEthing.

Keeping people entertained. Or at least helping them procrastinate. Hyperbole and a Half

cheers,
emma

Psithurism

My MRA was meditative. Swaddled in pillows and blankets, earplugs, donning a football mask, I spent 15 minutes in a coffin. Computers and lasers and things I don't understand, searching that which keeps me alive. What connects my mind to my heart? How was it weakened? Where do I go from here?

This feels like the eye of the storm. How is this moment so still within so much NOISE!

God, why are you so difficult and awesome? Your methods are ri-friggin-diculous sometimes, but you weave. You work. You're the God. Here's my life again. Make good stuff happen.

Thoughts and observations:
- It was shorter than my MRIs. Didn't have to hold my breath or other commands. No IV - Nice!
- The people who worked there were SO agreeable and SO helpful. Nadine, I hope you get to spend more time with them.
- I didn't get a chance to perform my new hit single, "We All Live in an MRI Machine" ...huh? huh? Funny, right? Yes. Another example of what you can come up with on four hours of sleep a night! [Professional writer. Do not attempt.]
- The next challenge on Project Runway MUST-MUST-MUST be to design a better hospital gown. Come on. What would Michael Kors say?

I feel sick just looking at that! The color washes her out. It's falling off her shoulders, and Heidi, look at the back. Did she just pull this out of the waste-paper basket, because it has TRASHY written all over it. I thought the medical world was full of smart people. Oh wait, they're the same ones who came up with the paper vest. Have you ever been to an OB/GYN office that wasn't freezing, Nina? No? And they give you a vest. A vest made of paper. Figure-flattering is the least of our worries. Women deserve a hospital gown that could be worn on the runway. It is a GOWN after all!

MRA results Monday, I hope?

et

Expiscate

Found it! Found it! Only took 9 months, but I finally found this song-

(from December)

And I also don't know the name of that great mixed a cappella Christmas song I heard the other day. It starts "by ya ya by yun da da da" and then moves into a rhythmic "chigga din don dy ya" ... "bum bum yeddo bum ba yadday" ...?

Lol. Parlez vous Nonsense Jazz Syllables? If you know the song, please help a sister out. :-)

It's called "Familia" by Brazilian musician Sergio Assad. Performed by lots of other Assads (Odair, Clarice, Badi, Angelina, Carolina, Rodrigo) and Yo-Yo Ma. No recordings online to be found. Teeny excerpt here.

"The release topped both the classical and the mainstream Billboard charts and won a Grammy for Best Classical Crossover" (Opus 3 Artists, 2010).

Score.

As for me, resting up today for my MRA of head and neck. Smile, blood vessels!

Happy Autumnal Equinox!
emma

Defenestrate

meaning: to throw out of a window, e.g., After the receptionist lectured her for 10 minutes on other people's stupidity, the kindly young patient wanted to defenestrate the telephone. Could it indeed be her fault the doctor had illegible handwriting? Is this not a regular occurrence? What do I know. I'm just a silly girl. It says so, right there on all of my medical records. Born in NINETEEN-NINETY? And this test is for YOURSELF? Are you SURE?

Ah-ha-ha no, my shrill-voiced friend. Yooou're right. You have me all figured out. Just another prank call requesting an infrequently performed neurological exam. Couldn't fool you, miss. She must have heard the riot I caused last week. I rang up a less-than-well-to-do taco establishment and notified them of my chronic condition called POTS.

A small shame to society, I am. Pestering poor taco salesmen and pharmacists. Day and night, night and day. A menace. A practical joker sloppily signing MD's notepads, selfishly seeking the thrill of having my brain professionally photographed. I'll change my ways, Nadine, I will! Right after I put those pictures on the internet.

So here's hoping I don't meet Nadine in person this week. If she keeps me in the waiting room for 20 minutes, then I'll know it's her. ("Hold please. You're at the end of the alphabet.") Then I will defenestrate her lousy phone and computer and fax machine. And maybe swipe some fluorescent Post-Its... for later defenestration.

Kidding, kidding.

Besides. It's on the first floor. How much fun could THAT be?

paperweights,
et

P.S. - My blog (yes, the one you're reading right now!) is listed as a source for the POTS page on Wikipedia! I found out a few days ago, by my "Stats" page on my Dashboard. The numbers blow my mind. In the last 60 days, Stronger On The Other Side has been accessed 2,263 times (not including me). Most people are from the U.S. Second place goes to Luxembourg! China, Germany, Canada, Australia... are you kidding me? So cool. POTS awareness to the max.

Hope you are well. Any requests for future posts? Would love to hear from ya!

Here's the Wikipedia link (Citation #18)

Syzygy

What a weekend. My family is so loud and so loving. I had a blast. Our schedules were pretty flexible, allowing me to rest between activities. I think I earned an equivalent of 10 credit-hours of Marx brothers and Stooges references. Laughing literally makes me forget POTSy stuff. Minimal pain; fatigue and tiredness were main symptoms.

Congratulations to Matt and Katie! The party was so fun. I felt like it was a celebration for me too, just being there. I wore heels for this first time in almost 2 years!

Now we're home. I have 11 bruises on one leg. I'm extra tired. I lost my voice a little. So worth it! So, so, so thankful I was healthy enough to make the trip and rock out with my aunts, uncles, cousins, and Katie's grandma. So thankful for my wonderful family.

Bob's your uncle,
emma

Queue

Pain yesterday. I felt like there was something stuck between my brain and my scalp. Like a piece of crumpled-up construction paper. Maybe orange. Burnt orange. Like the color that gets neglected at the arts-and-crafts table. Bent and cut and used as confetti. And then the confetti got stuck in my brain. Seriously, I wanted to take off my scalp and wash my brain.

Anyway. Doing better now. It is 7am, and my family and I will be leaving shortly for Michigan, where we will meet up with more family. Predictions: chaos and Bill Cosby.

Hoping I have enough energy for a few days of craziness. I am determined to make it out of there alive. Israel class next week!

StoryCorps is so eye-opening. Enjoy this video:



all the best for your weekend!
emma

POTS Blogs

I slept for 8 whole hours last night. The breeze smells like autumn. Tomorrow I get to babysit. Smile-worthy.

Sending smiles out to POTS and CFS bloggers, and blogging in general. What a wealth of knowledge we each have, and how easy it is now to share our experiences. Especially in suffering and confusion and frustration, I hope you find these pages helpful and/or humorous.

Michelle: http://bobisdysautonomia.blogspot.com/

Alyssa: http://feelingpotsy.blogspot.com/

Teresa: http://toomanyheartbeats.blogspot.com/

Robyn: http://otherdumbquestions.blogspot.com/

Tyler: http://www.12morepages.com/

Emily: http://invisibledisease.webs.com/

http://www.greenwordsgrowing.com/ ("Green Words")

http://potsitivelyfabulous.blogspot.com/ ("Little Teapot")

[Used without permission. Is that OK?]

I avoid cliches like the plague,
emma