Tuesday, January 27, 2015

English Breakfast Tea

It's all coming together! God is so good!

I am healthy! I am driving! I am working! I am moving out in less than three weeks! I AM SO HAPPY!

I want to post pictures of my baby (my rental) but I can't figure out how to get them off the website. At any rate, it'll be more fun when I'm in the picture!

Just waiting for the paperwork to go through and everything to be finalized. Then I have to pack up all my stuff! Whoa! I mean, my place is only 10 minutes away from where I currently live, but I haven't moved since I was 11! So I may need help figuring this stuff out.

Oh look! I got the picture to work! I'm the first floor unit. :-) Don't worry, aunties of the world. It's very safe. And I have British neighbors! :-)

More to come...


p.s. I took away the picture b/c it showed my address and wasn't too comfy with that. If you would like my address, just let me know! :-)

Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Tazo Passion

Today is Day 6 in a row of good days! No pre-seizures! Wahoo!

Back at church. Love them kids. It's great to be back working with them!

Days are still not perfect, but it's improving so much that I'm really not worried. I sleep maybe 9 hours at night and nap 2 hours during the day. Have some chest pain, but it passes if I rest and relax. God is so good! I am so blessed to be feeling better.

Looking at apartments to rent this Saturday. Please say a prayer that the one I love will still be available!


Friday, January 16, 2015

Egyptian Mint Green Tea

Today has been a better day. No pre-seizure episodes.

Good friends do for you what you can't do for yourself. They give you a different perspective. A more hopeful approach. They cheer you on and remind you how far you've come. They open the curtains to reveal the bright future that was there all along.

And maybe they give you some pizza or hummus to take home, because they want to make sure you're eating. :)

Everyone says the first year after losing someone is the hardest. So to make it a little easier, and to keep in touch with my mom's friends/cousins/etc, every Friday in 2015 will be Mom Tribute Friday. Today was Week 2, with our trainer and dear friend Val!

And here's from Week 1, our best gal pals Camee and Amy!

Or if we don't want that straw pointing at my belly button, the edited version!

Shout-out to my newest reader, MR! Love ya, girlie!

The days are getting longer. Keeping my chin up.


Tuesday, January 13, 2015

McNulty's Chamomile Tea

I've got a thing for chamomile this week, it seems.

Pre-seizure episodes three days in a row. Brief, but it counts nonetheless. [Insert your favorite expletive]. If Mom were here, she wouldn't let me mope. She'd throw me in the car and take me to the gym where we'd endure a grueling, sometimes (ok, a lot of times) tear-filled workout. She wouldn't let me get sedentary, complacent. She challenged me.

I wish I had the strength to challenge myself in the same way.

Trying to be patient and gentle with myself. But what if that's what's making me sicker? Around in circles I go. And back to the couch to watch "Call the Midwife" and cry, because I used to watch it with my mom, and every episode is about motherhood.

Today's sage advice comes from somebody. I don't remember who. "Get into community. They will lift you up. Plus it's good just to get out of the house."

Women's Bible Study this morning, Spirited Women tomorrow night. Check and check.

Keep breathing, baby emma.


Monday, January 12, 2015

Fair Trade Organic Italian Chamomile

My sister is back at school. The house feels far too big, far too empty. I miss my mom. My heart is breaking.

It's all I can do to just function. Eat. Sleep. Get dressed. Lie on the couch. Cry. Write a thank you note. Agonize over which birthday stickers to use. Cry some more.

Today's words of wisdom are from Lorraine: Take a shower. Everything seems just a bit more manageable one you've taken a shower.


Sunday, January 11, 2015

Evening in Missoula

Post titles will be whatever tea I'm drinking today.

Survived the worst days of my life. Loving friends and family members helped a lot.

Now sleeping a lot, a lot, a lot. Last night I slept 10 hours. Then I went back to sleep for two hours. Then in the afternoon I took a four-hour nap. This is not terribly unusual. But my body needs it.

Having trouble focusing. Sometimes I space out when other people are talking. Trying to be very gentle with myself and forgiving of the fact that I'm not functioning fully.

Taking others' advice, particularly those who have gone through grief before. Today's words of wisdom come from cousin Barbie: Eat your vegetables.


Sunday, January 4, 2015

2015 is here

My mom passed away on New Year's Day. Not ready to talk about it.

Just finished writing the eulogy I'll be giving. Don't want to talk about that either.

I love stickers. I love Downton Abbey. I love that my cousins are coming all the way from Hawaii to be at the wake and funeral service. I love that my mom loved return address labels as much as I do.

Now just to make it through the next 48 hours...