Cue the Sun - Daphne Loves Derby

Not doing well. Blood work in a few days.

Hope this Weakened Weekend goes by fast.

et

Little Birds - Eric Whitacre, BYU Choir

Yesterday was good. Today was bad. Treatment was okay. It's snowing. Stop that.

Rediscovering dissonant polyphony,
et

On Children - Sweet Honey in the Rock

"You can house their bodies
but not their souls.
For their souls dwell in a place of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit,
not even in your dreams."

Brain fog. Um. Tired. Found my "I ♥ CHOIR" pencil! Happy.

emma

Brand New Day - Joshua Radin

Friday's treatment, new points. Terribly moody but I slept better last night. Doing halfway decent. Snowstorm's coming in now. Tomorrow might be rough.

Coraline is the scariest movie ever. Shudder.

For my sister, by request :)
"These are the headdresses of the queens that have gone before us. This is the blood of our people, the moon women from which we gain our strength to rule all worlds. We are the flames of the fires, the whirling of the winds, waters of the rains and the rocks and stones. I declare we are the mighty Ya-Ya priestesses. Let no man put us under. Now our blood flows through each other as it should. Loyal forever. YA-YA!"

I do decla-yah,
et

Run To You - The Rocket Summer

Yesterday I had the opportunity to speak at my high school. An area mom with two POTS-suffering children gave the majority of the presentation, educating the nurses, guidance counselors, and social workers about POTS. There are at least eight 8th-12th graders in the district who have already been diagnosed.

I was feeling totally miserable and wasn't sure I'd be able to make it at all, but it was good to be there. The faculty are genuinely concerned for the well-being of the students. I forget how strong a network Stevenson can be.

In terms of my "speaking," it was more along the lines of me talking for a few sentences, getting side-tracked, forgetting what my point was in the first place, and asking for more questions. Mom and Jodi jumped in, which was great. I felt somewhat helpless to suggest how a POTS patient should be treated academically. Teachers can give extensions; schedules can be adjusted, sure. But at what point does a person, CAN a person, choose to leave to focus on their health?

Chronic illness is not my cup of tea. Unless such tea will be thrown into Boston medical schools for researchers and doctors to study and solve. Yeah. Take that, you crumpet-and-doily crowd. Wheah ah de tea POTS?

Anyway, it went well. Exhausted since, but what else is new. Acupuncturist is insisting on a few more visits.

cheers,
emma

I'll Rise - Ben Harper

aauuuggggghhhhhh.

I'm looking for a dealership or pawn shop or black market or SOMETHING. Where can I trade in this miserable failure of a body? Please, something. Memory's bad, vision's bad, heart's bad. Bad, do you hear me? BAD. WAY BAD.

Henry David Thoreau had Walden Pond. I, on the other hand, have a couch. Reflecting on universal themes depicted in reality TV and detergent commercials. Sigh. My wilderness: life as a teenage shut-in.

But seriously, black market? Anyone?

peace,
emma

The Pomegranate Seed - Cosy Sheridan

Very weak, tired, cloudy. Even after treatment yesterday, I only slept 5 hours last night. So not enough! Acupuncture might be on its way out for me.

VICKS TISSUES! wow, this day just got a whole lot better :-)

et

P.S. - The Washington Post reports a medical mystery which turns out to be POTS: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/02/12/AR2010021204444.html

What Is Love - Night at the Roxbury

This week I'd only been getting 3-4 hours of sleep a night. More fatigue, tremors, the works. Then Dr. Choe used some new points...and I slept 8 hours last night! Yeah! But he's upfront that if I'm not seeing improvement in another week, I should stop acupuncture. Still feeling tired, taking it easy. One day at a time.

Julia's show was outstanding. So grateful I got to see it! :)

bravisimo,
emma

Dela - The Beautiful Girls

We're doing a few "stronger stimulation" points in acupuncture. Hurt my hand. Keeping an open mind. Things will get better.

Too much snow. Not enough circulation. Very cold. Sleep would be nice. Take the pain away please.

These colored pencils are a disgrace to colored pencils everywhere. I shall put them in a trash can and set it on fire.

endurance,
emma

I Understand - Smokie Norful

Improvement? Some, for sure. Been able to read more easily. Takes a little longer to get physically fatigued. But I think I'm still going through an emotional purge. Working through all the anger and grief and uncertainty. It's a process, but a much-needed one! Hoping the highs and lows will flatten out this week.

Looking forward to more acupuncture today!

et

Ne Me Quitte Pas - Regina Spektor

Had a short burst of energy today, yay. Have some bruising. Still moody. The doctor says that it's a normal and positive sign that I'm reacting strongly to the treatments. It'll take some time for my mind/body/spirit to get closer to an equilibrium. Day by day.

Thanks to my family for giving me space. Sorry I resemble a velociraptor.

peace,
emma